Pulling Weeds with God

me: What do I do right now?
God: Pull those weeds.
me: so I did....
...And a blog post was born.

I find when my life is in a "surprise season"... and what I mean by that is something I didn’t see coming.... i.e.  Covid  

I need to stay very focused on the heart of God to help me navigate through it. So the above conversation is a very normal part of my day.  I find God speaks to me in the simplest things and the greatest revelations of His love and care come to me this way. 

So now I’m going to paint you the picture of my weed pulling time with God and how He spoke to my heart. He really does still speak in parables if we listen. 

As soon as I bent over and started pulling weeds my little 3lbs  Yorky Ricky started to bark her head off and the more I pulled weeds the more she barked.  For whatever reason she just did not like that I was doing this.  But after a time she quieted herself down now more interested with the new smells that had been unearthed from the weed pulling. For dogs those are pleasurable smells I suppose.  As I was finishing up it started to rain which cleaned up my job nicely.  I knew God was trying to get a message across to me in this seemly simple task but I didn't see it till hours later when I was in my quiet time with the Lord pouring out my heart about something I was just not happy about...then I realized I was Ricky! Here I was barking at God because I didn’t understand what he was doing and then I realized He was just weeding my garden to bring out a more beautiful fragrance...and that thought brought such a refreshing rain to my soul. Thank you Lord for the intimate way you speak to our hearts and how you and only you can restore our soul. 

 

...Make my garden breathe out fragrance, Let its spices be wafted abroad. May my beloved come into his garden And eat its choice fruits!"

Song of Solomon 4:16 

 

Stuck in the middle with you

When I wrote yesterday‘s blog I wasn’t intending there to be a part two. However in an anonymous comment from somebody named “Hope Floats”  something stirred in my heart that I’d like to share with you today. First of all, ANYONE that knows me knows that is my all-time favorite movie. 

It’s the story of a wife who is publicly shamed at the knowledge of her husband‘s affair with her best friend on national television. She then has to restart her life with her daughter, go back to her hometown to live with her very eccentric mother and face many of the reasons why her life got to where it did.  It’s actually a great depiction of what I blogged about yesterday on having to go back to move forward.  And of course it’s an adorable love story... so I won’t give any more detail in case you haven’t seen it. But oh if you haven’t go rent it! I always see Jesus all over this movie. How He comes in and redeems our lives and rescues us when we are the most broken. 

But there is one famous line from this movie that I will share with you...it is...  

“Beginnings are scary, endings are often sad, but it’s the middle that counts the most.”

 And that’s where I find myself right now... in the middle .... I think sometimes the hardest place to be in our Christian walk is in the middle. Because beginnings we know ...endings we know, but middles, well middles are often a place where we might not see very much detail. It’s where faith has to really have its way in our life, where we have to lean on and trust the author of our story, which is Jesus.  So today if you find yourself in the middle like me and you don’t have very many details for your future just give hope a chance to float up, and it will. 

Return to your stronghold, O prisoners of hope; even today I declare that I will restore to you double. Zachariah 9:12

That video just cracked me up... because after I wrote this post I asked the Lord what picture or video should I add? I kept hearing this 70's song "stuck in the middle with you" playing in my head. I looked it up in many different versions but all seem inappropriate...(well except maybe the line "clowns to the left of me jokers to the right" just kidding LOL). So I’m looking at God saying how do you want me to use this song?! The Lord says to my heart, "Put in google search the name of the song then add Christian lyrics after". So I did, and this is what it gave me! You just can’t make this stuff up... God is so cool and so fun!  

Digging up old wells

"You can't go back."  This is a popular saying in our culture. But what I love about God is He has a way of taking us back and moving us forward at the same time. Recently someone said to me when I was looking for some direction in my life, 

"Go back to where you started." 

I love the story in Genesis 26 starting in verse 12 where Isaac was told to go back and dig up the old wells that had been filled in by the Philistines after the death of Abraham.

That's what happens to us sometimes in life. Our dreams are like those wells and they get filled in with the muck and cares of this world so we have to go back and dig them up.  To sum up the ending of that story it goes like this... because Isaac was obedient and dug up the wells it brought him to a place of prosperity and peace with his enemies when they saw God was with him. So I'm say all that to say this...that is why I'm blogging again.  I had a dream here and I've come back to dig it up so I can move forward. 

And I'll leave you with this prayer my dear friends. 

Lord, for anyone reading this post today in your mercy and kindness reveal to them where wells (dreams) have been filled in by the enemy then give them the courage and the boldness to dig them back up! 

In Jesus name...Amen! 

Looking for grace in all the wrong places

We can't expect to find the grace for something that hasn't even hit our life yet.  That's what makes worry such a tormenting tool of the enemy. He flashes a "what if this happens?" thought into our minds, and if we are not careful to take every thought captive as we are told to do in 2 Corinthians 10:5,  It becomes an argument or like the word says a high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God.  I don't know if anyone can relate to this but I'm just going to be real here and share what happens to me if I let myself get to that point.  I get stuck in my head looking for solutions to problems I don't even have, and in reality most likely won't. Wow, what an energy zappy that is!  But if the trouble does come you can rest assure in this truth my friends... nothing comes into the life of a believe that does not come with great grace. We cant look for tomorrows grace nor the next situations grace we might face if we haven't even arrived there yet.  Gods grace is sufficient when we are smack dab in the middle of our need for it.  So stop looking for grace in all the wrong places I promise you it will be there waiting for you with wide open arms when you need it.

PS. I think I'm naming my next dog Grace...better yet Great Grace. ;)

 

Dancing among the ruins.

Two years in heaven. You know my love I'm so jealous!  But I still feel your presence so strongly with me. Like I have through every moment of this journey. Even now as I'm shedding my mourning garments and allowing God to replace them with garments of joy, I see you smiling with approval.  Because I know no one knew my heart and my love for you better then you.  I know I gave you everything I was. And I thought it all went home with you.  But I'm seeing now my heart can beat again.

A dear friend of ours told me she saw you smiling at me with your hand on the small of my back ever so gently pushing me into this next season.

What a lovely thought, and oh so you Richard.  
Your love was always so sacrificial and unselfish.

But it's scary.  It makes it all finally feel so real .... Your gone.... Your home.  I know it's hard for some of the people around me to process this as well. But I've done this journey so publicly up till now and I can't change that.  I want people to see the joy on the other side of grief. I want to show others the goodness of God by living out loud.  

Our friend I spoke of earlier also said this to me. 

"God is not going to waste your heart".  Isn't that beautiful? He's not going to pour His love into our hearts and not give us a place to pour it back out.  I wouldn't even begin to say I know my future.... I have truly learned to live one day at a time.  But I do now see love is definitely part of it.  And I know you approve. So this anniversary I am celebrating with you my love.  Because we are both right were God has ordained for us to be and that has always been our greatest desire.  
Happy two years in heaven.....
I am dancing among the ruins my love.

Give Jesus the biggest kiss for me!

Love Lightning Your,

Anna

In loving memory of my beloved Richard

I had a date tonight...

and He gave me the loveliest flowers…

and then He painted me the most beautiful sunset...

and sang over me...

till I lost myself in adoring Him.

Yes, I have found the one my heart loves. 

Back on track

I found myself going down paths in the last few months that I realize now were not Gods best for me.

However, the greater lesson I learned from this, made it all worth it. I found that even when we may be moving in a direction we shouldn’t be… if we keep our heart towards God he always gets us back on track.

And the real beauty is,

 He is always there with arms wide open...

Thank you Lord for always coming to find this run away…

Feeling…