You don’t have to be fixed for me.

The greatest support you can give someone who is grieving.  Even long after what most may think is the sufficient time to heal.

Is to be ok with the fact that maybe they are not fixed yet.

Knowing with them, that one day it will be ok again, 
but "one day" is just not here yet.

I know as humans we want the people around us to be ok, to be fixed. Because it makes us feel ok… it makes us feel fixed.

If we are honest with ourselves broken people make us feel broken.

But I thank God for the eyes to see brokenness in others.

And the ability to say “You don’t have to be fixed for me”

That only comes when you’re aware that you’re broken too.

So that’s what the 30 day photo challenge did for me.

Somewhere maybe I thought I would be ok (fixed) after it was all over.

Like I thought when spring came this year after the long cold winter…

or the one year anniversary of Richard going home.

Like the many other mental millstones I’ve made… telling myself “when this happens I will be better”.

But all these things come and go and I’m still broken… I’m not fixed.

So I hang on to this scripture and say it over and over again.

Everlasting joy will crown their heads.

Gladness and joy will overtake them.

Sorrow and sighing will flee away.  ~Isaiah 51:11

I will even play-act it as I say it.

I place an imaginary crown of joy on my head.

I wave my hands over myself as if gladness and joy is overtaking me.

And I fling away sorrow and sighing with a violent thrust of my hands... far,far away from me.

Sometimes you have to look a little crazy to stay sane.

Because if anything is going to fix me it is going to be the word of God.

That is what I have learned from this 30 dog days of summer, photo challenge.

Really dog is only… God spelled backwards. ;)

And it really has been 30 “God” days of summer, photo challenge for me.

And as it has come to an end…

I hear the Lord saying to my heart.

“You don’t have to be fixed for me”.

And I find peace in that.

So my little buddy you don’t have to be fixed for me either.

 Sweet little Jasper with his little blue friend.

He never lets it get far. Like Linus with his blanket. 

I often find him just standing on it like this.

As if he is saying…”I dare you to even try and take it”. Not that anyone would. Even the other dogs know…you don’t touch bluey!

Well Jazzy…you keep squeaking and I’ll keep clicking.

And “one day” is going to come… someday.

Window view...

That’s what photography is in my life…the “window view” of my soul.

For the last 30 days you had a windows view of my soul trying to recover from its dark winter’s night…

one picture at a time...

And I guess you can say it’s been a dog’s eye view ;)

(Enjoying life)…to the fullest

This year is a pivotal year for my pack.  More than half of my dogs will be elderly. Dogs are considered elderly after the age of 8.

Because of this and that I am no longer taking in fosters. I’ve decided to sanctuary the dogs that are here to enjoy the remainder of their lives.

As long as the good Lord continues to provide and bless this endeavor, that is my plan for the pack.

I have to say when Richard first past away I did not believe I could continue to care for this many animals on my own.

But we have found a new normal and although it is a great sacrifice of my time and resources I feel determined to not be part of the

problem that caused us to become involved in dog rescue to begin with. Which is people often giving up their dogs because life’s

circumstance make it no longer convenient to keep them.

I’ve committed to this from the beginning… and like this photo challenge I am going to see it through.

And how could you say goodbye to this face…who has found her place in our world, and is just “enjoying life”…to the fullest!

Enjoy and live life so completely that when death comes to you as a thief in the night, there will be nothing left for him to steal.

~Unknown

A smell you adore...

Or Miley Cyrus!

 Sorry sometimes I have to laugh at stuff or all cry.

My daughter filled me in on all this scuttlebutt about Miley Cyrus’s performance at the MTV music awards.

I made it about a minute into the video… and I just could not watch the rest

What a shame is all I can say.

And only more proof this is a generation that needs our prayers more than ever. :(

Mirror...

...mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?

I said fairest …not the spoiledest! 

PJ'S

PJ’S in our world stand for Puppy Jams".

That’s when all the puppy’s jam up to the door because they want to come in….hehehehe

(Favorite shoes) Favorite memories

I thought a lot about what I would blog today… this being the one year anniversary of Richard’s departure to heaven.

There are so many things going on inside of me. Part of me didn’t even want to say anything …I just wanted it to be, 
"just another day". But it’s not…and it never will be.  It will forever be burned inside my broken heart. So truly the only thing I can even share about what this past year has been like for me, is something a dear friend said to me recently.  Because it sums it up the best I can right now.  

She said... 

“Only God knows how many tears you have shed over Richard’s death.”  

And I must say as I write this blog I am adding to that count.

So to keep my mind from breaking under the sorrow I am feeling today I need to shift my thoughts to a happier memory of my beloved Richard. 

It was brought back to me because of today’s photo challenge...

"Favorite shoes"

My favorite shoes are not even mine, they are Richards. So I'm going to tell you the story behind why this is.

My husband had a darling habit when we went out shopping.  He would carry my purse for me.  Trust me anyone that knew Richard can attest to the fact that he was all man.  But he was also the most thoughtful, caring and tender husband… and so Christ like in his care of me. 

This became so second nature to us we never thought anything of it, and I'm sure at times I had some pretty girlie looking bags....and we must have gotten some pretty funky looks. LOL

This was a time when it wasn't so socially acceptable to be open about any alternative lifestyle… and definitely not in our very quaint little town.  But like I said we never thought anything of it until this one summer day when we were out together shopping.

We went to the mall in town and at one point decided to go shop in different directions. Richard like always was carrying my purse as we parted ways.  He was on a hunt for a pair of men's clogs. Again this was something that was not popular even in our country yet… let alone in our neck of the woods.

Richard strolled up to the counter with my big flowery purse slung over his shoulder and asked the clerk it they carried men's clogs… and if not could they order him a pair? 

It wasn’t until we met back up and Richard was telling me how bizarre the clerk treated him that it finally dawned on us what he must have thought of this man with this big ol' girlie purse walking into the store looking for a pair of clogs.  We busted out laughing so hard. And although it was a few more years till we could finally find Richard “men's clogs”.

They always reminded us of that funny day. 

So now they belong to Mr. Jasper because there will never be another man on the face of this earth who could fill those shoes as far as we are concerned.  They usually sit on the floor beside my bed and will till the day I die and see my beloved again.

So I’m going to end this post with some pictures of Jasper’s favorite memories of Daddy… :)

And if dogs could cry real tears… 

imagine how many Jasper would have cried this year as well.

Empty

That’s a perfect word to explain how the house feels right now, especially for little Gwendolyn.  Our Princess Shannie has left our kingdom this week to get ready to go back to school.  We only had 24 hours notice she was departing us so it was harder than normal for Shannie to separate from her Gwenie.  And if she could have, she would have made her a stowaway in her luggage…

So, as you can see Shannie’s bag was far from empty.

However her bed is much to empty for Miss Gwenie, so she has taken to sleeping with a teddy bear to comfort her empty paws. 

We miss you Shanwee...and Grammy wrote this blog post just for you, so you know your always in our thoughts. :) 

Big/Tiny/Same

Well I’m sure it’s obvious why I chose these two brindle puppy’s for my “big/tiny/same” subjects.

However, what’s not so obvious is what a challenge it was for me and one of my subjects to get these shots.

The picture above although not the greatest and a little out of focus…I will treasure forever… because that sweet little Dachshund is terrified of the camera. So much so I don’t believe I will ever be able to get another picture of my two brindle's together again.

In fact she was so scared she pee peed all over my chair :(

That ended the shoot immediately. Not because I cared she peed, but because I was not going to torment my sweet little girl…she broke my heart. :(

And it was a true miracle I was able to get these few shots. 

Incidentally that’s her name…Miracle. :)

I love her sweet face!

Your'e gonna get the spoon

When I say to the dogs you want the spoon? It has a much different meaning then it did for my children ;) lol

It means treat!

My dogs LOVE peanut butter.

So here's Markus getting the spoon.  :)

Fond (childhood memory)

One of my fondest childhood memories was going to the

drive-in-theater

Something I realized after reading an article in our local paper may soon be another thing future generations will not have the joy of experiencing.

Because of the phasing out of 35mm film and the cost to upgrade to digital it will be beyond most mom & pop run drive-in’s to upgrade. Therefore many of the 350 theater’s left in the country will soon be forced to close.

So I know I’m a tad nostalgic but that just saddened me.

I feel like we lose more than just a unique family night out…

…we lose a simplicity of life.

And one day this blog post picture will make no sense to a future generations.

Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.

~Confucius

In my bag

It’s a total delight for me when I get to go shopping for a new bag.

And it’s always an added delight when I find a bag that has any kind of doggie bling on it.

This is one of my favorites…

I love the Scottie dogs and the lining…which I’m sure you all know by now is my favorite color. :D

And of course a requirement for all my bags is they much fit 

Lil Ricky….hehehehhe

I often take a video after a shoot just for me...but I wanted to share this one because it's too funny.

Out and about

Jebediah, probably more than any other dog I have loves to be 

"out and about" with me.

He doesn’t even have to leave the car. He can just be happy going along for the ride.

Oh but he sure is the happiest when that ride ends up at the lake.

Well, come to think of it... so am I.

I think I just made our plans for the day ;)

Nothing to fear...

…(After dark) around here…

When your bed buddy's a Pitty. :)

I'll have a leg of (water)

Lil Ricky has this wacky fetish with the water on our legs after we come out of the shower.

She comes running when she hears the shower go on. And the minute you come out she's right there to help dry you off…

Shannie loves it…lol

You melt me with your (smile)

So many people ask me “how is Jasper?”.  Especially people who really knew the special bond Jasper and Richard had.

And well like they say... a picture’s worth a thousand words…

Jazzy has found his own way of adapting to the loss of Daddy.

I call it squeak therapy.

He will do this many, many times a day. He just hangs on my bed and squeaks his blue puppy to his heart’s content.

I often hear him from across the house and for some reason it has become a peaceful sound to me.

Maybe I should start some squeak therapy...seems to really be working for Jasper.  :)

Butter's (bubble) bath

Part of this challenge for me is seeing if my dogs will do something for me when I have an idea.

And I have to say thus far, Butter has earned the reward for being the most patient with her crazy Mom.

Rub a dub dub Butter's in the tub.
I love my dogs!

(Retro) fro

Jazzy sporting his fro for today’s word.

This is a hair tie…Richard and I would just put this on Jasper so we could laugh our butts off.  We called it his fro…for afro. I found it the other day and the first thing I did was put it on Jazzy. And just like always…I laughed my butt off… until I cried. :/

That day I snapped a quick picture also...

 It is amazing the things you find and the memories they can bring back.

Knock knock...

Who’s there?

Orange,

Orange who?

Orange you glad you’re not one of my dogs.

You can tell I have been hanging out with a 9 year old all summer.

So I might not be willing to put my dog in the refrigerator…but I am willing to dress my dog up with what’s INSIDE the refrigerator. lol

So that's our shot for orange.

We love fuzzy orange fruit :) 

On the shelf

This one had me racking my brain…

I was thinking maybe I would put one of the dogs on a shelf in the refrigerator and then let Shannie open the door and scare the bejeebers out of her.  But then the thought of having to close the refrigerator door on one of my dogs just seemed to creepy ….even for me. Lol

So as I walked around the house trying to come up with something for “on the shelf”. I started noticing how many shelves in my house already have dogs on them.  

Then it started to become a game…even Shannie began to play it with me… we were finding dogs in every nook and cranny, and on every shelf.

But this one in the bathroom was my favorite and my shot for “on the shelf”

Snoopy will always be top dog in this house…even if he's not even an inch high.

So I had to go back and see when I posted about the dog days of summer photo challenge did I say it had to be a real dog ....nope I did not.

The beauty of making up your own challenge is you can bend the rules….hehehehe

Happy Monday Everyone!

Oh, what’s warm and fuzzy and orange all over?

Stop by tomorrow and find out ;)

Architecture

If it were possible for me to put a door on what I believe is the most amazing architecture… created by the most brilliant Architect…it would look like this… 

 Nothing manmade beats out the creator... all mighty God.

I don’t divide architecture, landscapes and gardening; to me they are one.

~Luis Barragan

Black & White

I just could not decide between these two shots for my B&W photo challenge.

I love the moodiness of this first one…

 And the sweetness in this second one.

The thing I really love about black and white shots is you can wear the craziest mismatched clothing and no one would ever know.

Unless you have a Grandmother who blogs about it....LOL ;)

(Breakfast) with a friend

Shannie eats her breakfast every morning with Mr. Jebediah The big dogs get let out and feed first. So while I’m tending to the little guys, Jebb likes to go hang with Shannie.  When I saw the word breakfast this was the first thing that came to my mind. I love peeking around the corner and seeing their little morning ritual. Here Shannie is saying grace, but she's also keeping an eye on Mr. Jebb… just making sure he doesn’t bless himself with a little nibble.

And this shot is just a freebie. I love how he is holding out his tongue like a child would their hand saying…

Lie down look up

Guess what boy’s …that’s not even the shot I’m going to use for lie down look up. But thanks for the chuckles…lol

This one is…

The view from my camera lying on the porch as Miss Glory gave Mommy her paw.  What a good girl. :)

Egg on your face.

Determined to come up with something for “egg”… I grabbed Mrs. Beasley and some eggs and went into the studio.  I was not coming out till I came up with something. 

I cracked and emptied an egg for an idea I had... that totally did not work.

And even though she wasn’t having anything to do with my ideas… I’m so glad it was Beasley I chose. Because as I was photographing her I saw something I have never seen before…the white on her face is the shape of an egg!

And I did NOT Photoshop this …that is her face.

Isn’t that EGGcellent…lol

Macro

Stands for photomacrography. 

Which is an extremely up close shot.

 The only other thing I can say about this shot is...

I loved it so much I printed it and framed it.

An animal’s eyes have the power to speak a great language.

~Martin Buber